I’m pretty much always reading a parenting book these days, at least one really. Because like I told my daughter, I have no idea what I’m doing and need all the help I can get. Thank goodness for God’s guidance, grace and great resources.
Someone suggested I read the book, “You Can’t Make Me” [But I Can be Persuaded] – Strategies for bringing out the best in your strong willed child by Cynthia Ulrich Tobias. I put it on hold at the library. I’ve been waiting since October to get this book. That’s right, October, and when I went to renew it I can’t because someone else is waiting for it. Seems like I’m not the only one who has a strong willed child at home they would like help with.
I had to chuckle reading through the book because I was reminded that I am a strong willed child. My husband said, “You didn’t realize that?” with a nice smirk on his face. I know I’m stubborn but I fit many of the descriptions of a strong willed child as well. I never said I was overly self aware or maybe I just like to live in denial.
Anyway, this book is such a great resource. Pretty sure we’ll be adding it to the library for future use. It was written from the Christian perspective (which I didn’t know going into it), she refers to other books I love such as Parenting with Love and Logic, and it is short, not repetitive, has real examples and very practical suggestions in it. I like all those things. I like to know what I need to know and get out with something that I can apply and this book did those two things. Now, to just put the things I learned into practice.
Here’s the quick summary at the end.
Remember,
You Can’t Make Me,
So don’t:
- back me into a corner and leave me no choice,
- tell me what I will or will not do,
- insist that something can’t be done,
- demand I obey without question.
But I Can Be Persuaded!
So do:
- value my ability to see the world from a unique perspective,
- find ways to inspire me to change the world,
- ask me for my input,
- recognize my uniqueness even if it bothers you.
Life is too short to constantly battle those you love. If you can begin to understand the inner workings of an strong willed child’s mind, you may hold the key to his or her heart. It sure beats knocking down the door!
This sounds like a great read Jody! Thanks for sharing it. You’d probably enjoy The Whole Brain Child by Dan Siegel too which explains the use of right and left sides of our brain and how to stay connected with our child in the midst of meltdowns and challenging times. Your kid’s are so fortunate to have such a loving, godly mom! 🙂