I’ve mentioned how I don’t love waiting rooms. I feel like we been in a lot of “waiting rooms” in the past few months if you will. Maybe it’s just the waiting that I don’t enjoy. But that’s an entirely different post.

Today as I sat in the waiting room for my post-op appointment there were many women coming and going, some obviously full of life inside them and some I know were because the receptionist or nurse congratulated them excitedly. I have been prepared emotionally for a while for this surgery, for the reality that I would no longer have a womb, never again carry a child. But grief is a funny thing. It can sneak up on you and catch you at the craziest times. It was another reminder of what I have lost. No one congratulates the woman who has had a hysterectomy at the age of 33.

I don’t share this (again, some of you may be thinking) to gain pity. It’s just my life in process and it is what it is. God has not written my story like every one else’s and for that I’m thankful. Honestly I’m so thankful for what we’ve gone through because I can relate to others who have walked similar journeys and it led us to Isaac.

I’ve heard it said that God comes to you as your life. If God has orchestrated my life as it is and He loves me, which He does, then He wants to relate to me and meet me in it. I want to take my life as the gift that it is and embrace it, trusting God in the process.

I’m pretty sure that Mary didn’t expect her life to go as it did, But God entered in with a crazy plan. She was to carry the Savior of the world as an unmarried teenager. Great idea God. I’m sure that she didn’t get congratulated on that either. But Mary trusted God, took it as an honor and a gift to carry out His plan.  And she gave birth to Jesus, a baby; not exactly how people imagined their King would arrive on the scene to rescue them I’m sure.

Sometimes the gifts God gives do not come in tidy, pretty, fun, comfortable or expected packages. So I’m faced over and over again, will I open this (whatever “this” is) as a gift and trust God with it or walk away angry and miss out on what God has in store for me through it? I’m learning that I can still mourn the loss of things that I hoped for and trust God and the gift that He’s giving me.

So as we celebrate Christmas, the birth of Jesus, the best gift the world has ever been given I will try to also embrace the other “gifts” that God is allowing in my life, even if I didn’t ask for it to be sitting under my tree.

I wanted to make Brittany a gift from Isaac for Christmas so I made one of the ornaments from pinterest that I found. It’s the same dough ornament recipe that I posted about before.  Well, it did not go as planned, nothing unusual. It seems that this woman did the little imprints of her kids hands when they were tiny and would actually fit on a normal sized ornament. I on the other hand have a child with man hands so instead of it turning out like a sweet tree ornament, it looks like wall art instead. It still turned out precious because it is his hand print after all but not quite what I had in mind.

Here is the original idea:

Here is how mine turned out:

I told Brittany she could open it early so she sent me a picture. She actually got it to hang on her tree. I can’t believe it worked. Amazing.

I am so thankful for our church home in Bozeman (I know we don’t live there but they are still home in many ways). I still listen to sermons from Journey, not because I don’t love our church here because I do, but I love our church in Bozeman still. They are about taking the love of Christ to the community and to the world. One of the things that I love are all the families that are saying yes to making a difference in the lives of orphans. They don’t just talk about it, they DO it. The message from last week was powerful. I watched with tears streaming down the faces of children who now have forever homes on that stage and I listened to the testimony of one of them (recently adopted from Ethiopia) as Brian interviewed him. I encourage you to watch it, even if it’s only the first few minutes of it.
[vimeo http://www.vimeo.com/32486608 w=400&h=225]

Kingdom Come #3: We Say “Yes!” from Journey Church on Vimeo.

I know that not everyone will adopt and maybe some of you don’t agree with International adoption but I’ve been to Africa, I’ve gone to orphanages and held babies who can’t walk because they’re never held, who have lost the light of life in their eyes because no one is returning for them. Those children deserve a forever home and I hope one day we get the chance to adopt from Africa.

I wrote a post last November about saying yes. Will you say yes? Will you help in some way to love an orphan?